Monday, March 27, 2017

Show not Tell Paragraphs

We have been learning about how to make our writing more descriptive so that the reader is interested and engaged.

For one of our ‘Show not tell task we were given a: Telling sentence such as ‘the pizza is delicious'. We then wrote a showing  paragraph to describe the telling sentence.
Here are a few examples of showing paragraphs for 'The cake is delicious' and 'It was a windy day'.

The cake was Delicious

Flexible, vanilla, sponge flooding with gooey, pink, fairy icing topped with, mouthwatering, Ocean blue, blueberries blending it’s watery juice to make the icing a bright purple.  Swirling like a tornado in my dry mouth, a tsunami approaches with delicious  icing when the fluffy sponge hit my teeth. Everybody could smell the juicy blueberries wafting in the air a mile away.

It was a windy day

The tree’s leaves rustle in the warm breeze as it whistles like birds in the early morning. The rubbish forms mini tornados as small as my little sister.  It howls like the kettle steaming. The fresh air running away fast.

By Keira

The pink fluffy icing lay on top the chocolate infested layers of sponge. The sponge layers are stacked like bricks. I plan taking a bite so I get a taste of every luscious ingredient. Mmm, so good!!
By Sophie

Dark chocolate icing smudged neatly all on the top with mouth watering strawberries.
The chocolate swirling in my mouth like a tornado.
Everyone around the table are begging for a slice of the best food ever.
“Mmmm so good”

I heard the breeze rustling in the trees outside.The trash was spinning round like a tornado. Cans banging on the floor like a cow slamming it’s cattle bell on the floor.
It was so noisey!!!!!

By Brayden

As I step out of the door with my groceries, my hair swirls in a tornado.There's leafs blowing through the air as trees dance.My shoelaces blow left to right as I take every step .I put on a cozy jumper as it gets colder and colder,

By Stacia

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